Sunday, May 16, 2010

F. Scott Fitzgerald's Penis

F. Scott Fitzgerald, as we know, wrote one of the most perfect novels of all time. He also had a very small penis, about which Zelda complained. One day, looking for reassurance, he took it out and showed it to Hemingway, who reassured him -- and mocked him for it forever after.

I do not know the size of Hemingway's penis. But I do know that it was nowhere near as big as he'd like you to believe.

F. Scott Fitzgerald had a very small penis. Maybe that's why he drank and engaged in obsessive neurotic behavior, such a writing novels.

Do men with nine inch penises write as many novels, statistically? If, before birth, men were given a choice, between literary genius and a genuine porno dong -- would we be living in an entirely oral society?

Or rather -- a world where all the writers were women and all the men walked around with silly, lopsided grins.

No comments: