Tuesday, December 05, 2006

The Life and Adventures of Randy Mesmer


When Randy Mesmer’s AIDS test came back negative, his friends embraced him, teary-eyed.

“Promise to be good,” they said. But Randy did not promise. Randy continued to spend every Tuesday and Thursday at the all-you-can-suck. Randy fucked and got fucked and still his AIDS test came back negative.

Well, his friends got understandably upset. They warned him of the disastrous effects of grasping desire, excess of rajas, gross lust. As time—and wickedness—progressed they grew baffled, then frustrated.

“I use condoms and a water-based lubricant,” Randy explained.

“You are putting yourself at a terrible, terrible risk,” they said. But they did not sound so happy or so sure.

Of course they did like Randy Mesmer. In spite of—you know. They liked Randy Mesmer very much but—to be frank—by going unpunished he was calling the whole system into question.

His continued sluttish larky existence was undermining the checks and balances and they had their marriages to consider.

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